Muriel skidded her Monte Carlo SS to a stop. "Dusted that fucker. Teach him to race an old lady."
Sitting at the red light, she revved the 450 cubic inch two stroke V8 with competition headers, radical cams, and high compression pistons. The roars could be heard in Connecticut as blue smoke filled the intersection. The Nameless One Jr. turned around in his seat. "Grandma, you're burning oil."
"So what else is new, junior? Let's go pick up some ice cream." Muriel floored the accelerator and ripped the pavement off the ground. The car jumped thirty feet and shattered windows all through the county. A traffic cop pointed his radar gun at her, but failed to get a reading. The SS was at Baskin Robbins in half a minute.
They both got out of the car and noticed that the Baskin Robins had been flattened. "Gosh, lose more ice cream stands that way!"
Blazing home, they arrived at the brick house. Jenny was out mooing in the back yard. "We keep telling her she's not a cow, but we need the eggs."
"Grandma, do you know that... yesterday... I was out, and I stopped this man... he was on a boat... and he wanted to shoot... he had these big guns... and New Orleans was going to be flattened... did you know that?"
"Yes, you told me. Go get your father back from Mars, alright?"
"Ok, but I heard on the radio... In my room... That there was going to be a big solar storm today... And it was going to affect the symbiotic relationships between ferrets and bugle birds... did you know that?"
"Caught wind of it... Now go get your father before his dinner gets cold."
"You want me to go now?"
"Yes."
"How much ya pay me?"
"How about I don't put you back in diapers?"
"Ok."
Once the tyke had left for Mars, Muriel loaded her rail gun and went out to hunt NRA members for lunch.
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