"Georgie, are the twist engines recurled yet?"
~No, Captain,~ came the disembodied reply. ~We seem to have a super-space reinforcement wave surrounding the engines keeping them from recurling.~
"Meaning..."
~We're going to have straight engines for a while yet.~
"Wonderful," said Captain Poopdeck. "Even in space we get homophobia. Where is Commander Biker?"
"Checking for where-when anomalies in the crew's quarters with Counsellor Boy-Toy," said Mister Woof.
"As I was saying..."
"Sir! There's a Twist-Yard distortion off the port bow!" screamed Lieutenant Traptin Tar.
"On window. Wait a minute! You're dead!"
Lieutenant Tar's face froze. She frantically grabbed her wrist. "You're right! I can't find a pulse!" She keeled over.
Boner ran over to her. "She's dead, Tim!"
Captain Poopdeck smacked him. "You twit, you're not in Star Trip the Tenth Iteration! And zip up your pants."
"Oops, sorry, got off on the wrong set." Boner stepped into the Super-Charged Lifter and was lifted away at super speed.
Poopdeck punched his chest miscommunicator. "Ouch! Doctor Brushstroke, Lieutenant Tar is dead!"
~Captain, you have to learn to let go...~
"No, I mean she's dead here, on the overpass."
~What!?~
"I was hoping you could explain it to me."
~I'm on my way.~
"Make it just like that."
Ensign Rowboat at the tiller turned to Barry, who was sitting beside her at the Shops Terminal, and asked, "I thought it was Commander Biker who got trapped in tar?"
"What, did his Harley spring a leak again?! Oh my, Georgie is not going to be pleased about that! No sir!"
"Don't call me `Sir,' Sir, you out rank me."
"I'm sorry, but I've just been overcome by the repetitiveness of it all."
"Again?"
"Captain!" barked Mister Woof, "The disturbance Lieutenant Tar noticed has gained in strength by three million percent!"
"On window!"
Off the port bow a twisting of the where-when fabric (which was corduroy at that particular location) could be seen by all with eyes in their heads and a working visual cortex. The twisting increased until a square-rigged ship emerged.
"Dear God!" exclaimed Barry. "It's the Bored!"
"Wonderful," said Poopdeck. "I've already heard the phrase, `yeah, whatever,' enough to last me twenty lifetimes."
